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The commercial is saying that Secret will keep you cool while you are sweating?

I read your blog before watching the commercial so initially I thought Lucy was saying these things to the manager directly, which could not have been since it was clear she was in the rest room. But thinking that way, my thoughts wandered to what the boss' response might have been to her comments. I believe that is as important as the employee's approach, not that I expect it would be in the commercial.

Lucy did seem to know that everything she was saying was not quite coming out right so it would have been good to then see her nail it with the best argument as you outlined above.

It certainly is refreshing to read about the legitimate and accurate reasons for the pay differences rather than the usual rhetoric.

Women CAN'T negotiate well or women DON'T negotiate well. Changing just that one word makes a huge difference in the message you are communicating. I read the rest of the paragraph to mean women "don't," and I would suggest making that small edit in the section title.

Kaitlin, I gently disagree. Methinks Stephanie effectively makes the more subtle point that objectively solid female negotiating skill still crosses a social behavioral line and generates discomfort. Even our relatively enlightened culture retains ingrained gender bias that affects communications interactions.

Too big a topic (and too potentially volatile, I must add) to cover in quick comments. Just note that her two bold captions are "myths" unfortunately flaunted in the commercial. Believe that Stephanie and all others here would like to dispel those false stereotypes and correct such depreciating or misleading assumptions rather than perpetuate them.

I agree, Jim. The section title was capturing the myth and the explanation explained why they don't. It's not that they can't because many do, I've seen it as well. I've also witnessed the discomfort.

Still women can be successful negotiators. Sometimes women feel they HAVE to negotiate harder, that they presume they are not paid equitably, because they are a woman, when in fact, per the qualifications etc, perhaps the position just doesn't warrant the compensation they are asking.

I'm glad to see this post has generated some discussion!
Just to clarify, the myth is that women CAN'T negotiate well. This is not true - when women DO negotiate, they are just as successful as their male counterparts. In fact, when women are negotiating on behalf of others, they are likely to be slightly MORE successful than their male counterparts. The pattern we see is that women are less likely to engage in negotiation (because of societal values, social penalties, etc.).
To follow up on Karen's comment, even the most prepared/skilled/practiced/(insert adjective here) negotiator is likely to be stressed and feel some discomfort prior to the actual negotiation, regardless of gender, race, ethnicity, age, etc. I would be more worried if I wasn't stressed prior to the negotiation, because that may mean that I don't really care that much about the outcome...

Awesome discussion everyone! Love it.

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